Fergal March 30th, 2021

The run up towards Calvin's birthday was a difficult time for myself. I was unsure how it would all feel and, in these unusual times, what could I do to remember him. The Scotland v France game was on the night before and it felt like the definition of a bittersweet moment. Calvin would've loved it! Probably would've been on his feet for the entire time the clock was in the red and shouting abuse at the French player who didn't kick it out after a Scottish turnover. I thought a lot about Brian and how many of these memories the two of them must've shared. The next morning was difficult, difficult to smile and remember the good times. I wanted to take part of the day just for him. I was receiving my second vaccine that day so I knew I would have around 1.5 hours to myself for Calvin. In the car I wanted to listen to something that reminded me of him and the first person that came to mind was Bruce Springstreen. It was lovely. I sang aloud the songs I knew and reflected on the past year. Reflecting on how devastating and unfair it has been for so many. But following my vaccine, there came a sense of hope for the future and thankfulness for what Calvin passed on to me. He is deeply, deeply missed and I love him. Fergal